What happens when a culture talks endlessly about the burdens of having children, but rarely celebrates the joy of raising them?
Women’s Forum Australia’s Head of Advocacy, Stephanie Bastiaan, recently joined SBS’s The Feed to debate “Why aren’t young people having kids?” The lively discussion explored financial pressures, fears about the future, women’s choices and the value we place on children and family life.
A mother of five with another on the way at the time of filming, Stephanie challenged the cultural messaging that portrays motherhood as a loss of freedom and measures women’s success primarily through their careers.
Women who choose to prioritise raising children, she argued, should not be made to feel that they are letting other women down.
Stephanie also acknowledged the strain on families when both parents have to work, leaving limited time and energy for their children. Supporting family life means taking those pressures seriously and making it easier for parents to care for their children.
But the barriers are cultural as well as financial. When motherhood is constantly discussed in terms of sacrifice, disadvantage and what women must give up, young people are given an incomplete picture of what family life can offer.
Stephanie questioned whether social media and rising expectations about lifestyle and material comfort were also making prospective parents feel they needed everything perfectly in place before having a child.
Throughout the debate, fears about an uncertain future emerged as a recurring theme. Stephanie offered a different perspective: previous generations raised families through enormous hardship and uncertainty, including world wars and the Great Depression. Uncertainty need not extinguish hope.
Australia needs a conversation about parenthood that recognises its challenges while also celebrating its joys. Women deserve support to build the families they hope for — and recognition that raising the next generation is a contribution worth valuing.
Watch the full debate on SBS’s The Feed.
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